Dragon Wars

Ok so maybe I'm just a little bit delusional but when a movie is titled Dragon Wars I would assume 1. that there are going to be dragons in the movie and 2. there is some type of war going on between them. And if you're expecting any of this from Dragon Wars then you would be wrong.

The movie opens with crack reporter Ethan (Jason Behr) covering a crime scene where he sees a suspicious looking "rock" that reminds him of something that he saw when he was a child. The movie flashesback to an encounter in an antique store where the owner Jack (Robert Forster) tells him the story of two star-crossed lovers, a warrior and a maiden, in ancient Korea (Hooray! for double flashbacks) where the girl must join with the good Imoogi (aka giant "celestial" snakes) to keep the world from being taken over by the evil Imoogi who would use the girl's powers to plunge the planet into eternal night and evil.

Flash forward to present day LA where the evil Imoogi has come to reek havoc in search of a girl with a dragon birthmark. He comes equipped with an army of evil LOTR knight rejects and dinosaurs with cannons mounted on their backs. This army is lead by a golden accented knight who sounds like he swallowed a box of nails and is supposed to be powerful but yet seems to have problems getting out of the way of moving vehicles or keeping his sword from being snatched by meer mortals.

Ethan finally finds Sarah the new chosen one who is being stalked already by the evil Imoogi (hahahaha! the word makes me laugh everytime). And even though this thing is seen all over LA and is the size of a mansion for some reason the FBI can't seem to find it and no one notices when it wraps itself around a hospital.

Ethan finally grabs his "destiny" and tracks down Sarah (Amanda Brooks) the new chosen one and helps her to escape the clutches of the giant evil snake.

The acting in this movie is bad. Jason Behr runs through the movie with the emotional range of a plank of wood. He spends most of it looking as if he's trying to remember his lines while Amanda Brooks delivers her lines like a third grader in a PTA rendition of Johnny Appleseed.

The only redeeming features in this entire movie were the CGI explosion that was the evil Imoogi and his army ripping through downtown LA and the showdown that FINALLY comes between the evil and good Imoogi. The problem with these are they come too little too late. By the time we get here we could care less if the evil Imoogi plunges the entire planet into darkness because you the viewer already feel as if you are there.

Let's just say nicely that Dragon Wars is a bigger budget Sci-fi Chanel Saturday night movie. Wait for Blockbuster to carry this one.